Agents – you’re doing it wrong!

If you pax are asking these questions, it’s time to lift your game.

Travel begins once I’ve dropped my bags, passed security, verified passport  and I relax, breathe  and I start observing the world around me with my “travel head” on.  The mindset remains until I collect my bag, pass through quarantine and then I’m back into Melbourne mindset.

In between I watch, observe, critique and participate.  I love process, intrigued by the tricks of the trade.  But most of all, my amusement and bemusement comes courtesy of other travellers.

Every trip there are numerous points that make me think  “they booked this online…. If not, they soon will if the travel agent treats them like this.”

Here’s five things your customers should never be saying when they travel. (Hint: find a way to tell them before they go)

  1. What do you mean you need my credit card?  The person at the front desk doesn’t know you, neither does the hotel, a simple swipe means that if you do empty the minibar and run away, they’re covered.  Not withstanding the odd screw up, the angst this causes is INSANE!
  1. That’s not the official exchange rate – you are ripping me off! It sets a benchmark that then gets manipulated by everyone else who handles your money in a non-standard currency.  If it’s an airport in India, expect to lose 10% with a smile, and be charged 23% interest for the money advance on top.
  1. What you mean I have to add tax? I’m coming to the opinion that Australia is the only country in the world that the price you see is the price you pay. It really upsets people when there is a random 17% added onto the bill. Read the fine print. Expect it.
  1. I am sh%^&ing through the eye of a needle! (heard it over breakfast….way too visual as I pondered scrambled eggs) It happens if you don’t wash your hands, eat the food from the street vendor or drink the water. Eat yoghurt, hand sanitiser, and have a whole stack of drugs ready to go to get you back on your feet. Lomotil anyone?

Number five is a prediction… Although I doubt I will hear it because I wont be there

  1. 18 hours on a plane to get to London in one hop is way too long!!  I long for the day when my time is so valuable that getting to Europe needs to be done three hours quicker. A break in the middle for me every time

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